How to Royally Irritate Me

Perhaps some people don’t realize this, but my easy-going demeanor can truly disappear if, and only if, a person follows these steps with exactness.

Step 1: Leave the parking lot just before me so that you are ahead of me as we approach the intersection.

Step 2: Approach the intersection with caution, and come to a FULL and COMPLETE stop at the green light, of course with your RIGHT-blinker flashing.

Step 3: Do NOT, for any reason, turn RIGHT through the ABSOLUTELY and ENTIRELY empty intersection.

Step 4: Remain stopped at the GREEN light long enough for it to turn from green to yellow, and continue to stay there until the light turns to red.

Step 5: Continue to stay put at the now red light, with your right-blinker still flashing.

Step 6: Watch for the opposite traffic lights to turn to yellow.

Step 7: JUST before the appropriate lights turn green, go ahead and turn right through the intersection that has been empty the ENTIRE time.

See? Was that so difficult? You were able to totally ruin my evening with just 7 simple steps. You probably weren’t inconvenienced in the least. If it were THIS complex, I’d be a bit more understanding:

Now I’ll just be up until well-past midnight, fuming about your ability to follow instructions so well.