Pop-Philosophy: Being Embarrassed

For this round of philosophyzing, we’ll be visiting a question that I’ve been pondering for quite a while. I don’t really have a good answer, so I’m curious to know what y’all think.

If you preface a statement with “I’m really embarrassed to tell you this, but…” and then proceed to share something personal IN FULL-ON DETAIL, were you really ever embarrassed at all?

I think that people say that merely to catch the attention of their listener(s), because if I’m actually embarrassed by something, you can bet that I’d NEVER share it with anyone, at least not without sufficient bribery. And, on top of that, if I’m stuck in a place where admission of guilt is eminent, my answer will be extremely brief.

For example, I heard someone (a female, for the record) sharing with another female about how embarrassed she is about her habit of biting her fingernails. It was quite a while ago, but the one side of the conversation was something like this:

“I’m really embarrassed to admit it, but I bite my fingernails all the time. I mean, I can’t seem to avioid it. When I’m waiting in line at the grocery store or sitting in traffic I just can’t help but start chewing. It usually starts with my pinky, but before I realize it I’ve gone through all ten!”

Really?! That’s embarrassing? So WHY IN THE WORLD did she go into so much detail in a place where I, a random bystander, could hear ALL of the friggin’ details?

Here is a definition of the word embarrass: “to cause to experience a state of self-concious distress”. Would it be considered some form of masochism if you were to cause your own distress? Hmm…

Now, I realize that many things, behaviors in particular, are embarrassing in certain situations or when they are exposed within certain relationships. Using the previous example, it might be embarrassing for the woman to share with a close acquaintance that she bites her nails, but it might not be so bad to share that with a significant other or a close friend. My close friends know a lot about my quirks and habits, and to discuss them, or make them subject to such, doesn’t cause me any distress at all. But these are the same things that I put away when I’m at work, meeting someone new, or on a first date. (I wouldn’t DARE discuss a nail-biting habit on a first date!)

So, while I’m curious to know what you all think, here are a few additional “embarrassing” things that I’ve overheard in public (and some that have been shared with me in an equally awkward situation):

• Health Issues, especially those dealing with certain “private areas” of the body (I REALLY don’t need to know what you coughed-up the other day)
• Bodily function-type stories (Um, grow up?)
• Things done to irritate a spouse/significant other (I don’t care to be in the middle of these, especially since I’m not the Sig-O)
• Other pesky habits (chewing on hair, picking nose, picking ears, etc) (Eww.)

In conclusion, if you’re going to preface it with some indicator that it embarrasses you, chances are I don’t want to hear about it. And, for that matter, unless you’re sharing it with your own paparazzi or stalker, the other person (or people) probably don’t want to hear about it either.